A Mom’s Perspective on Vets Day
Veterans Day is upon us, and our thoughts naturally center on our men and women in uniform - the best and most courageous individuals serving the defense of our nation. These patriots sacrifice every day in ways we cannot imagine. We take this time to honor and thank our service members, past and present, and reflect upon the selfless honor and duty they exhibit every day.
I was a military Mom for six years. Our son, Darren Manzella, served as a decorated medic and a sergeant in the Army until he was discharged. He was deployed to Iraq for 12 months on his first tour in 2004 and served another 15 months in 2006-07 on his second tour. As all military families, we are so proud of our son. He earned the Combat Medical badge honoring him for treating American and Iraqi troops while under fire. He saved lives while putting his own in precarious situations. He treated gunshot wounds to blast injuries and more. He was "out there," and we knew he was in constant danger.
The stress was incredible for our family, but we also shared another concern for his safety: Darren is gay and served openly as a gay soldier during his second tour. The constant threat of discharge under "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" was always on our minds. We worried about the harsh consequences Darren would face if the Army decided to take action and the potential abuse he could encounter.
Darren became a very strong, confident and proud young man during this time. He went through many obstacles and persevered to be true to himself, along with affirming his self-worth in the process. Darren e-mailed us almost every day to let us know he was doing fine, and told us stories about the people he served and the Iraqis he met that touched our hearts and made us laugh.
The support that the American people showed for Darren warms my heart to this day. Darren had been in Iraq on his first tour of duty for six months and was finally on his way home. After many long hours on a flight to the States, he found himself on a connecting flight from Atlanta to Buffalo. The passengers saw his uniform and realized he was a returning soldier. They thanked him for defending our country. To them, he was a VIP. They shook his hand, bought him a drink and asked about the war. One couple who owned a T-shirt business had Darren design a logo for his medical unit, which they shipped to Iraq for the members of his unit to wear. The pilot of the plane, realizing Darren was returning from war, radioed ahead to the Buffalo airport. The airport requested a special shuttle, which transported Darren to a facility where he could freshen up before meeting his family.
Darren was overwhelmed by the special treatment he received, as were we. I want to thank the people on that flight for treating our son so well - every soldier should be treated that way, regardless of who they are.
It is time for our laws to reflect the values of equality and respect shared by the American people. It is time for us to relegate "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" to the ash heap of history and give all our veterans the honor they deserve as true American patriots, no matter their sexual orientation. The American people thank our veterans for their service, gay and straight alike. It is time our government does the same.
11-06-08 By Nancy Manzella |
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